Nokia N96 just got a little cooler for me.

Beijing makes people do crazy stuff. I woke up this morning with this urge to reorganize my room so I can clear off the desk for a surface to draw.

The wind was blowing at 20mph and the windchill was 0°. I biked to the local market (which I like to call the “Commoners’ Market” for a more rustic feel) to pick up a bookshelf. The market sells authentic “MADE IN CHINA” stuff at real and bargainable “MADE IN CHINA” prices. I bought a not so pretty particle board/thin metal bookshelf for 50RMB, assembly required.

The unassembled box of stuff was almost as tall as me and longer than my bike. I took it outside of the market and stared at my teeny tiny fold up bike and thought to myself, “WTF am I going to do??” A Chinese man stood and observed while I stared back and forth at my bike and the big box for about 3 minutes in the crazy cold weather. Finally, he said, “It won’t fall!”

So I strapped the big box to the back of the bicycle. I peddled some and I pushed some. It was ridiculous.

I thought, at any moment, this thing is gonna pull an E.T. and go flying.

A local beauty parlor in an alley on the edge of East 4th Ring…

The shop name, in the 4 big characters, is called “White People Pretty Hair”.

Services offered (in the smaller white characters): 7-color extensions; 7-color highlights; ionic perm; handcrafted big curls; nutritional maintenance; aluminum foil perm; make big flowers; monthly membership discounts; brow trimming; black slow cooking (?); one time straightening; color slow cooking (?)

Interesting services… I am picturing this lady at the door…

Cognac + Martha + Snoop = Genius.

Snoop Dogg & Martha Stewart

I am back, for real. I just got internet hooked up at my apartment earlier this week. The process is quite different from calling Time Warner and “press ‘1′ for new service”. We had to get our landlord to go to the ADSL distribution office and stand in line for god knows how long… Then I had to learn the Chinese words for router and modem so I can buy those things… Finally, I had to use my roommate’s PC to set up the router. It is all good now.

The lessons is that if you want something done in China, expect a *very* tedious and ambiguous process.

Above… a model at a photoshoot set in front of a 798 art district gallery. I love it. Eat your heart out, America’s Next Top Model.